In Memory

Every Goodbye - spoken or unspoken has something to teach us. The truth is that life isn’t always meant to be understood. The Goodbyes without explanation, though the most painful, Can be an invitation to not only grieve - but to grow.

What we do know is that depression isn’t a choice and isn’t who someone is. But profoundly affects the person who suffers with it, as well as those close to him.

Let’s go forward and honor with gratitude, the beauty of Len’s life. Len was a good man, to his core, honest and just. He was quiet, understated, focused on seeking to understand, rather than be understood. His care and concern for others, was often a cost to himself. He sacrificed for others - In all his roles, as a husband, father, son, his family, and friends. Len was humble, not one to boast. Although he was an accomplished disciplined athlete with the strength of a black belt, triathlete, and cyclist he offered that gentle strength in the most heartfelt way. The family universally describe his bear hugs, and genuine interest in them, most often turning the conversation away from himself. Except - When he smiled broadly with a father’s pride as he talked about his children and family.

As a family they shared camping, the highlight to all was the memories they made on their Yellowstone adventure. All were in smiles and joy. I’m told that Len’s executive skills of planning and precision facilitated the perfect trip. But the real treasure was his sharing his incredible appreciation of nature.

Julie and Len were married on April 11th in 2006, on the beach in Jamaica. They shared two beautiful children, Riley, and Connor. Lizzy, the family dog will miss Len as well. He was her favorite person.

With Riley, he passed along his long-held knowledge and interest in reptiles, particularly snakes. Recently together they updated the larger habitat that was necessary for her pet snake, ECHO, a beautiful ball python. They also shared an interest in Dungeons and Dragons and enjoyed this together. Cooking was another activity they did together, particularly with the process of making sourdough bread. Bread making is a mindful practice and the result is warm and nurturing, like a father’s love.

With Connor, Len and he shared the fun and challenges of building and racing remote control cars. It was an activity that again was assisted by Len’s engineering skills as he worked with Connor.

The interest grew from small cars to bigger four wheelers that they rode and enjoyed together up north. Both he and Riley each had their own and Connor even became the mentor as he gave rides to his younger cousin.

Len also enjoyed playing video games with Connor, a favorite was Fortnite, along with Minecraft and Halo. That was a time to hangout for father and son.

Although Len resisted his piano lessons as a teenager, his children both have developed their musical talents. For Riley it is the clarinet and for Connor it is the trumpet. Len proudly attended their performances.

To his parents Len was loyal and devoted. He continued to help with health issues, and he was committed to assist Bob in their shared pursuit of hunting and fishing. He was their cherished son; no words could express their depth of their love for him. Sandra, his mom, states that he was an honorable extraordinary person who was full of life. His laugh and smile truly lit up her life as she called him her son and moon.

Bob, his father, recalls that in Len’s early years, when they lived in Virginia, he spent lots of time helping his dad with his Saturday part-time job maintaining Ripon Lodge. Bob passed onto Len his strong work ethic but also the balance of having fun. On Sundays, it was time for sharing the activities they loved. His current co-workers all attest to the dedication that he continued in his career, stating that he had the vision to plan, problem solve and ability to manage any challenge that arose.

When Len was seven years old, they moved back to Little Chute to be closer to the all the VandeHey family and its many activities. With what later became a family tradition, Len was the first of his cousins to graduate from Xavier High School. He was a great role model to his younger cousins who bonded more like siblings. Especially Jake who was his fishing and hunting partner and co-conspirator in many shared interests, including the fireworks extravaganza on the annual July 4th family outings. They are Godparents to each other’s children, and brothers in spirit.

Jake relates that Len brought a calm and strength with him wherever he went. Whether building a tree stand with a thousand pieces or carrying a moose through the Alaskan Tundra. If he was with you, no obstacle or challenge was too tough. He says that no one would accuse Len of being quick or early, but he was always prepared. He goes on to say that while Len loved a good party, he equally loved sitting on the porch up north smoking a cigar in silence.

Len was connected to nature and the earth as an avid hunter and sportsman.

Although he was surely proud of his trophies, the woods held the peaceful place for his spirit and the waters a lulling calm for his soul.

As a passionate gardener, Len embraced the lessons of change in the seasons of a garden.

The promise of spring in a seed.

The beauty of summer in the soft warmth of the air, and the bounty of fall and its last fruits. Len shared his harvest graciously and practiced the “farm to table” principals with his specialty salsa, pesto, and pasta sauce that Julie helped can and prepare.

Family smiled that he also shared his garden with tall healthy weeds and hungry deer.

We know that Len is on his journey to his Next Place, loving us still.

Remembering us from his earthly life and wishing us well. And that he will be a gardener and find a place where peace and harmony will lift him, and his spirit will soar again.